the night before....

lucrurile se aseaza...trebuie sa ai rabdare, one step at a time and so on....teoria o stiu de mult insa practica ma omoara...
incerc sa stau departe de intrebarea " de ce? " incerc sa stau departe de mistere, enigme, fucked up situations...dar nu-mi iese...nu se poate , thrillin nu?

nu exista trecut sau viitor ci doar momentul prezent in functie de care noi raportam cele doua emisfere temporale....dar asa cum zicea cineva, demult ,fara azi nu ar exista un maine...da corect si toate se intampla cu un scop si asta e corect ....
si mai departe de un noapte buna si un sarut pe obraz exista doar limita unui buna dimineata si mireasma cafelei abia prajite....suntem in rio? nu, un pic mai aproape dar abia a rasarit soarele si ti-am zis ca de bine arati usor dezvelita in lumina rasaritului? nu...cuz..we ,are before sunrise...and then is just you and me....

daca pana acum imi era dor sa-mi fie dor acum doar imi e dor...si da ai grija ce-ti doresti ca se intampla....si cel mai important sa stii ce vrei.
el o priveste imbracandu-se si cu silueta in lumina lunii arata ca o fantasma...ca o morgana, o iubeste si stie asta si in acelasi timp stie ca ea nu are nici cea mai vaga idee ce e in sufletul lui. ea se uita spre el, se apropie de pat il priveste in ochii si zambind ii spune: sunt mortissa, sunt acolo unde trebuie sa fiu la momentul potrivit si in acelasi timp sunt alianara sunt exact acolo unde nu trebuie cand nu trebuie dar pentru tine sunt ambele...pentru ca tie iti dau tot....apoi il saruta pe obraz si pleaca. ce a lasat in urma va vedea cand se va intoarce....pentru ca ea intodeauna se intoarce....

november rain in liege....

i didn't manage to write here this month...so maybe it will be a good ocasion to do that now.
i just came back...wish i didn't at least for a good period of time...but i am here now and i have to put up with this for a while...

last days were like the great escape, the getway car, a vintage one but a great one. i felt free, different, i found myself and i realized, if i had any doubt, that i don't belong here...i can't say for sure that i belog there either...but here no way...

i found many answers and i got even more confused in the same time, i had an intense emotional status that reached different levels from plus to minus and vice versa. i felt alive and back on track.

we had a lot of interesting adventures, and stories to tell but it's not where u go is how u feel for a moment in ur life and if u find that moment....it lasts forever...and i did again, i found it and now i have to make sure it will last....but the only test it has to pass is the one of time...so i shall see

anyways one thing i know for sure, and u know me u know i am soo fucked up and confused and i never know what i want or what is the rite thing to do....but what i know for sure is that my home is on the road....i will never get tired, and if somewhere over there i also find u maybe i will give u extra...i will make a stop and then i shall move on and on and so on...i don't care about the destination, cuz the trip makes it worthwhile.

it is a big confusion around me, like an english fog but even so i go further, and god knows time passes really fast and it knows only one way...i won't chase it, i won't try to stop it either, i will just go along wid it...i'll just flip the coin and spin the globe and see what comes out...who knows afterall life is like a box of chocolates...u never know what u're gonna get....

p.s se spune ca ochii care nu se vad se uita, poate ca asa e dar sunt alte lucruri care nu se uita...ever si cateodata acele mici detalii fac diferenta...

not a good day for " science"

sometimes when you are kind with people...they think u are obviously stupid...big mistake!!!!
i'm sick and tired of 2 faces people...i'm sick and tired of pretenders, i'm sick and tired of fucked up lies!!! really now...get a life you people...a real one or live in ur imaginary life but far away from me...
the main point is that whenever you want to help people...they see in u and endless source of good, they take advantage of that and take u for granted...beeep again big fuckin mistake!

why people are soo fuckin stupid...most of them and cannot accept the idea of living together without useless conflicts...
nevermind...to end this stuff i wanna point out that i hate hypocricy and all it's hidden shapes and i've had enough of it....

p.s fuck off...

ironic

many people have asked me why i have this ironic status everywhere...what does it mean? what i wanna say?
i told them...nothing...it's just a mood...just a way of feeling...not that i am ironic, i mean i am but this is not the point. i see time ironic f.e or life...it's like life is mockin you.
yeah i see that ironic...how u perceive a thing in a way and how that thing turns out to be something else....ironic ini't?
or else...like in the same time on 2 different channels you listen to same news but even though the core is the same the news looks totaly different from a chanel to another... is like telling a lie dressed in a truth coat...
as i can see it it's kinda hard to tell 2 true things about a matter in 2 different ways...but meaning the same thing...like on 1 way u deny it conscionsly and on the other hand u approve it conscionsly....funny, no...just ironic!
i don't expect you to understand...i don't want to is just another fucked up theory that i wrote in the so called "public diary"...
i am really sleepy now...and it's like an entire night waiting for me...but i'm really not in the mood. what would i do now? jump, run, hide and deny any conflictual dilema of the heart...pass on a box and move on to other level...shut up and kiss the rain, close the eyes and open my umbrella...sit down and dance and fall asleep and forget to dream....

p.s i miss paris....

english homework....and a cig in the rain...

october rain outside...in old bucharest..but i'm waiting for november one...why? dunno...i guess it's like old times and for me the rain equals november...at least in the autum...
i like this weather is my kind...like i said last year is london weather in paris and i feel like home...
where? i also don't know...i guess i will figure that out later...maybe my home is where u are...always on the road...everytime in other city and stuff like that....
will i ever get tired? maybe someday but not now...now i feel like i have to go further...to move on to new places...new people wait for me to meet them...others...the ones i already know...i left behind...not for long but some of them got used to me like that, to be left behind...so what? i don't care. yes i am selfish and what? i never forget!!!

i just remebered what somebody said to me long time ago: kiddo u're hard to forget and banned to remember...maybe...maybe not i guess it's how u are perceived by others
i don't mind to figure that out as long as i make sense to you...
anyways...i realized i can have a very deep conversation with someone i never met before...he accidentally bumps into my mail...and sends me by mistake a note...and so an entire thing is developed...how come? why do we feel this need and curiosity out of the blue to connect with people we didn't meet face to face and have a great conversation? i guess is the human spirit within..or just a great day for making new connections...who knows?

what time do i leave the office, he asks! well i don't have a office...i'm a freelancer, i answer. i face the world by my own brand...i don't act on behalf of others but i have a cool attitude to stand for...and so he is silent and thinks..
u still there, i ask? still no answer...and yet..i get it! yes i am...i'm shoked and inspired in the same time...
i say to him: leave this for other day...now i have to go...i shall talk to you again or never..i guess it's a matter of faith..or choice call it as u wish. and so i go!

i also realized that these days in bucharest...i keep on hearing ur name..it's bizzare..why? another question wid no answer...is not that u have a very common name and this is even more weird.
all in all...i must leave now. where? u shalll find out when u see me there ...untill that keep in mind one thing: most of human life is wasted in waiting...so stop doing that...and njoy the ride.

p.s i love you

hidden in a belgian box...

un frappe...o tigara si the sound of church bells...undeva in piata mare in sibiu...si da u were rite 4 days were to short..but intense si la urma urmei asta e ce conteaza.
next time is my turn to run away to you...si noiembrie e o luna buna petru asta...asa ca expect the unexpected, the box has to travel si o data cu ea si noi...

sunt multe de spus...dar si mai multe de simtit..is like i told u feelings hidden in gestures...si deja am spus tot...and u know it si e enough :)

restul ramane intr-o poveste inceputa undeva departe intr-o tara mica si cocheta...intr-o seara fumand o sisa si acceptand o provocare...si oui je suis cap... :)

and the story goes on...departe...si noi o data cu ea si asta e doar inceputul...is the moments that take ur breath that matter...

p.s finnaly am avut chef sa scriu aici...
p.s 2 a trebuit sa ajung la sibiu pentru asta.. :)
p.s 3 se lipamai... mult :D
p.s 4 ur getting to be a habbit wid me :)
p.s 5 hidden in a belgian chocolate box :P

lost in liege....

different place..same story..or almost but the core is the same...again i keep for myself the essence...what i can say is that:

1. thanks Pat for hosting - great house as i said :)
2. thanks Fred for facebook pictures...i look really waisted :P
3. great time and talk with u Gosia...hope to see u again soon
4. and yeah again je suis cap...and i know u are also...so..u already know what i mean :)
5. thanks for the morning frappe and croissant and...the rest...stays b/ween us...

si da...de data asta e for real :)

luxembourg before sunrise....

this time all i have to say is that....

1. glad to see you again
2. nice to meet you
3. thanks for the ride at the hospital
4. und yes je suis cap... :)

the rest of the story is just for me...and for those that lived it with me...

hope to see you again...soon...

lots of love...